SEXUAL PROBLEMS

Help with Sexual Difficulties

When Something So Personal Becomes Difficult

Sexual difficulties can be upsetting, frustrating and sometimes difficult to talk about. Many people put off seeking help because they feel embarrassed or worry about how their problem might be received.

In my experience, these difficulties are often more common than people realise.

Sometimes there is a physical cause, sometimes an emotional one, and sometimes a combination of the two. Anxiety, past experiences and the pressure we put on ourselves can all play a part.

Whatever the difficulty, you can talk about it openly and without judgement.

CALL AILSA: 07968 109402

Sexual Difficulties I Work With

Premature Ejaculation

Premature ejaculation can become particularly frustrating when worrying about it happening again makes the situation worse. This anticipation can create anxiety and pressure, making it difficult to relax and enjoy sexual intimacy.

Where anxiety or learned responses are contributing, therapy may help address those patterns.

Vaginismus

Vaginismus involves involuntary tightening of the muscles around the vaginal opening, which can make penetration uncomfortable, painful or impossible.

For some people, fear, anxiety or previous experiences may play a part. Others experience vaginismus without any obvious emotional trigger.

My work focuses on the emotional and anxiety-related aspects where appropriate, alongside any medical or specialist treatment that may be needed.

Sexual Performance Anxiety

When sex becomes something you feel you have to get right, it’s easy to become caught up in worrying about what might happen rather than enjoying the experience.

A disappointing or embarrassing experience can sometimes lead to ongoing anxiety, even when there is no underlying physical problem.

Therapy can help address the fear of repeating that experience and the pressure associated with it.

Sexual Difficulties Following Trauma

Distressing sexual experiences can sometimes affect how someone responds to intimacy, even long after the original experience.

This might involve fear, anxiety, avoidance or uncomfortable emotional reactions that seem to happen automatically.

We can work with these responses carefully, at a pace you’re comfortable with, without requiring you to describe intimate or distressing experiences in detail.

How I Work

I primarily use BWRT (BrainWorking Recursive Therapy) when helping clients with these difficulties.

BWRT works with automatic emotional responses and learned patterns that can develop around particular experiences or situations.

For example, someone may consciously know there is nothing to be frightened of, yet still experience anxiety or an unwanted response when faced with intimacy.

The aim is to help change how those situations are responded to, rather than simply trying to manage the anxiety each time it occurs.

Depending on the circumstances, I may also incorporate hypnotherapy or cognitive techniques.

Every client is different, and the approach will depend on the difficulties you’re experiencing.

What Happens During a Session?

We begin by talking about the problem, how it’s affecting you and what you would like to change.

I work with clients individually, and everything is approached discreetly and professionally.

You won’t be asked to do anything that makes you uncomfortable, and BWRT doesn’t require you to give detailed descriptions of past traumatic experiences.

You’re always in control, and we take things one session at a time. I won’t tell you in advance that you’ll need a particular number of appointments.

Hypnotherapy

Cognitive therapy and processing

When Medical Advice May Be Needed

Sexual difficulties can sometimes have a physical or medical cause, so it’s important that these possibilities are considered.

For problems involving pain, penetration difficulties or changes in sexual function, I would recommend speaking to your GP or an appropriate healthcare professional.

Therapy is not a replacement for medical assessment or specialist treatment, but it may be helpful where anxiety, fear or emotional responses are contributing to the difficulty.

Getting in Touch

If you’re experiencing sexual difficulties and would like to find out whether I may be able to help, you’re welcome to contact me.

I offer a free 20-minute consultation, giving us an opportunity to talk privately about your concerns and whether my approach would be suitable.

Call or text 07968 109402, or contact me by email.

There’s no obligation to arrange further appointments.

CALL AILSA: 07968 109402

07968 109402 · cheshirehypnotherapist@gmail.com

See current fees and appointment information

Stress and anxiety have a major impact on our sex lives and although some medications can interfere with performance (e.g. causing impotence), generally speaking MOST sexual problems are psychological in origin, or psycho-sexual problems. Maybe as you read this page this is your first step in trying to find something that is going to make a difference to your sex life, something to stop the arguments, frustration, feelings of inadequacy, feeling that something ‘is not quite right’ with your sex life?

Perhaps your partner constantly wants sex but you have a low sex drive and it creates tension between you?

As a male nothing can be more disheartening and frustrating than not being able to perform sexually as in the case of impotence or when having erection problems or ‘erectile dysfunction’. Premature ejaculation can also leave men feeling useless, rejected, awkward, feeling ‘on the spot’ and unable to satisfy their parnter.

Many women that I see have been unable to reach orgasm (Anorgasmia) or have problems with their sex drive or have a fear of intimacy or fear of penetration or intercourse. I also see a lot of women who suffer with Vaginismus, which can be highly distressing.

“Hi Ailsa,

I’m not sure if you’ll remember me but we had a number of sessions together in Autumn 2008 where you helped me overcome my Vaginisimus using Analytical Hypnotherapy. I can’t thank you enough for helping me as it’s made such a huge difference to my life. There has not been a trace of my old symptoms since you helped me. I’m over the moon! I wanted to share my testimonial with you in case you’d like to include it on your site to encourage others to contact you. Here goes:

”I saw Ailsa almost 2 years ago in connection with a sexual problem that I had been experiencing for some time. I was suffering from the symptoms of Vaginisimus and it was having a very negative impact on my sex life. After trying all sorts of things to try and help the problem, I came upon Ailsa’s website and thought that hypnotherapy might be worth a go as although this was a physical symptom, it was very much ‘in the mind’. I was nervous about contacting her at first but from the very first phone call I felt greatly reassured that I had just taken a very important step in getting better.

The initial consultation was very informal and relaxed with Ailsa asking questions to understand my problem and the best way to approach my treatment. After this we completed 9 sessions of Analytical therapy and, I’m very pleased to report, got to the bottom of the problem. I can’t describe to you the relief that I experienced and just how liberated I felt following these sessions. A massive weight was lifted and I haven’t looked back since. There has not been any trace of my old symptoms since Ailsa helped me.

I firmly believe that this is the only treatment that could possibly have gotten to the root cause of the problem and hence allowed me to overcome it. Medicine had already tried and failed and counselling simply could not have gained the same results. I have absolutely no hesitation in recommending Ailsa to anybody who feels that they could possibly benefit from hypnotherapy. Ailsa is a person who you can trust, who will treat you with the utmost care and respect and will bear no judgement upon you whatsoever. With her, you can be sure you’re in very safe hands.

Thank you so much, Natalie”